Are there things that have happened in the past or are there current events in your life that are frequently bothering you? How can you possibly begin to change any of it right now? If you can change the situation, and you would like to, can you do it now or make plans to do it? If you can’t, are you willing to consider changing the way you think about it?
Life is like the weather. It alternates between sunny and warm, light or heavy rain, hurricanes, tornadoes or a spring breeze. Do you want your sense of well-being to be dependent upon the pleasantness of the “weather”, or would you rather feel good rain or shine? If we choose to focus on the dreadful weather we experienced in years gone by, we might miss the lovely summer day that is offered to us now.
You might say, “But that flood or storm (hurtful life experience) was memorable! Am I just supposed to forget about it?” No, we probably wouldn’t forget about it. The question is, does remembering it, re-living those feelings and talking about it serve a purpose that is helpful to you NOW? Does it make you feel better? Does it enrich your life? Does it make you more loving or kind? Does it make you more prepared for unpredictable weather conditions in the future?
The only reason, in my humble opinion, to spend time thinking or talking about past experiences is to get the lesson that they are offering us, but then to move on. For me, if I don’t move on, I am stuck in the past, bringing my past experiences into the choices I am making in this moment. If you want to know if that is a good thing for you or not, ask yourself how it makes you feel when you think about it? If it feels good to you, it’s obviously beneficial, if not, it’s bringing negativity into your life today. Once we are aware of that we now have a choice. Each choice will create a different feeling inside of us.
If we want to feel good and leave the negativity of the past behind, are we willing to consider RETRAINING our thoughts. Our thoughts dictate our actions and reactions. Choices like blaming others, anger, complaining, rationalizing/making excuses, not taking care of ourselves, or holding any thoughts that limit us in any way will need to be escorted out (or blown up 💥) if we want to feel better. They can be replaced by something that smacks of more kindness toward ourselves, like accepting 100% responsibility for our lives, compassion toward ourselves and others, and making time to care for ourselves. All of these choices can begin with the smallest of steps. But the most important step is your intention or desire to begin to change things!
Well, you might wonder, do I really have a choice about what I’m thinking? I am here to tell you the answer is unequivocally YES! You can purposely choose “the road less traveled” and change the negative thoughts or feelings you are currently experiencing into something that feels better? It’s your life, your choice. If you like the way your life is going, stay with your current thoughts. If you want something better, why not change your thoughts to match your dreams, one small step at a time.
With love, Jackie