Are you familiar with “Choose your own adventure” books? As you are reading the story, you come to a point where you have a choice as to how the story continues. Well, life is like that.
The way this plays out in real life, is that we get to decide what type of reaction we are going to have to a certain situation, thus “choosing our own adventure.” Generally, the two choices are either a reaction from some type of negativity, like fear or anger, or a positive response from kindness or understanding. It may not feel like it, but we get to decide how we respond to a situation. Here is an example of what I mean from something I encountered.
Unfair or Advantageous?
I was recently involved in a situation where I must confess, my first reaction was to consider it unfair for me. This was a negative reaction on my part, common or understandable maybe, but fearful. I was aware I was in a negative place and it was causing me distress (as negativity always does). I wanted to change this and feel better.
I had two choices. They both started with accepting the situation exactly as it was instead of spending time and energy wishing it was different. I could either disconnect myself from the situation and people involved or I could choose to participate and look at what positive aspects the situation offered me. Considering the entire situation, the kindest thing to do for myself was to go with the second choice. I chose the second one because it felt better and I thought it was more advantageous for me than disconnecting. Choosing to look at it from a positive perspective left me feeling better.
Either choice would have been ok, though they would have led to different outcomes. I do understand that sometimes when it comes to making a choice, it is not a choice of which would feel better but rather, which feels “less bad.”
Whichever choice you make, realize that you cannot make a mistake. Either your choice will result in an outcome that you will like or you will not. That is always valuable feedback, useful for the next time this, or a similar situation presents itself. Make it a practice to acknowledge and use this feedback and it can change your life!
With love, Jackie